Love Notes From Paris

They are a good morning surprise at my bedside, sometimes they are gently folded other times they are tucked neatly into an envelope, they are proudly hung on my fridge or taped up on her closet door, they come with hugs, they come with smiles, they are the most precious thing you’ll ever see…they are love notes from Paris.

I can’t tell whether Paris loves to color and draw, or if she just loves to love people. She spends countless hours every week putting time and effort into coloring pages and drawings, each accompanied with a short sweet love note: “Mommy I love you”, “Dear mommy thank you and I love you”, “Mom I think your pretty and I love you”, “I love you mom”. And it’s no scribble, when you get a love note from Paris you get her very best. When she is working hard at her mini-masterpieces (this is what I call them), she gladly and proudly does so. She colors and draws on purpose, these mini-masterpieces deliver a very important message. She has intention and doesn’t hold back, nothing but her all for those she loves dearly.

Never once have I heard Paris say with words or action, “you only get a love note from me if…” or “I don’t have time for love notes” or “you don’t do anything for me, why should I give you a love note”. Paris is only 5 yet she’s figured out one of the most important things about life….others before self. How? It doesn’t feel at all possible that she’s learned this selfless love from us. I know I’ve said many times with word and/or action “you only get _________ if….” I say this at the store, at dinner, at bedtime, let's face it I say it a lot of the time. I’ve said “not right now”, or “ok well do that later”, or “tomorrow” when I know fully well this mostly means, probably not anytime soon if at all. I’ve said in word and action “you don’t deserve it” which pretty much sums up the phrase “you don’t do anything for me why should I do anything for you”. Man, if tears came naturally to me I’d be balling right now with shame. I wish I could say I’ve only held back on the material things, but truth be told sometimes I hold back my love too. But not Paris. She gives love notes to everyone in our family, whether they’ve been nice or not, she holds no account. She writes love notes for friends too (but how crappy am I that I say “ill make sure so and so gets it” only to completely forget). She always finds time to let us know she loves us, and she doesn’t require that we deserve it.

I’m not the best mom. By that I mean I could do better at setting a more godly example for my children. However I can’t help but feel humbled. If there’s one thing I know about God it’s that He is strongest in our weakness, and Paris belongs to Him not me. I can’t take credit for her good heart. I can’t be praised for her selfless love….Ok my throat is tight, and my eyes are welling up. I’m dysfunctional so I know tears will not be pouring out but my heart is. As I examine the situation I see so much evidence of God, and it’s painfully beautiful. I’m so thankful that right now she is more Chirst-like than she is Mom-like. Paris I am so proud of you!

(working on her birthday cards for this weekend's birthday parties)